May 29, 2014
Click to Listen: Episode 13: 2 Nephi 27-30
Drinking game is back! This episode is just prophecies and other babbling, but at least we can get our drink on!
“Drink” Count – 19
A little over 3 Beers
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A cockatrice is a mythical beast, its front half is a rooster, and its back half is a dragon. I think the hole of the asp means the snake hole.
It’s been years since I read the Book of Mormon cover to cover. It’s hard to not look at it as an oddity once you stop believing in it, little details that wouldn’t have fazed you as a believer jump out in a WTF sort of way. Hearing it from the perspective of a person that’s never read it before illustrates how weird it often is to anyone who doesn’t believe in it.
For the record, a common joke among mormons (or at least in my family) is that the definition of a few means eight. No one uses that in speech, but people might use the term “few” somewhat sarcastically.
Okay, Mormon history/propaganda time. This is from the official history of the church, written by Joseph Smith. The speaker in this this excerpt is Martin Harris, one of the three witnesses, who also played a role as scribe for the book of mormon dictation and financier of the the first printing.
“I went to the city of New York, and presented the characters which had been translated, with the translation thereof, to Professor Charles Anthon, a gentleman celebrated for his literary attainments. Professor Anthon stated that the translation was correct, more so than any he had before seen translated from the Egyptian. I then showed him those which were not yet translated, and he said that they were Egyptian, Chaldaic, Assyriac, and Arabic; and he said they were true characters. He gave me a certificate, certifying to the people of Palmyra that they were true characters, and that the translation of such of them as had been translated was also correct. I took the certificate and put it into my pocket, and was just leaving the house, when Mr. Anthon called me back, and asked me how the young man found out that there were gold plates in the place where he found them. I answered that an angel of God had revealed it unto him.
“He then said to me, ‘Let me see that certificate.’ I accordingly took it out of my pocket and gave it to him, when he took it and tore it to pieces, saying that there was no such thing now as ministering of angels, and that if I would bring the plates to him he would translate them. I informed him that part of the plates were sealed, and that I was forbidden to bring them. He replied, ‘I cannot read a sealed book.’ I left him and went to Dr. Mitchell, who sanctioned what Professor Anthon had said respecting both the characters and the translation.”
But here’s what Anthon had to say…
“The whole story about my having pronounced the Mormonite inscription to be ‘reformed Egyptian hieroglyphics’ is perfectly false …. I soon came to the conclusion that it was all a trick, perhaps a hoax …. [Harris] requested an opinion from me in writing, which of course I declined giving.” Anthon stated in the letter that the story of Anthon’s authentication was false, that Anthon had identified the writings as a hoax, and that Anthon had told Harris that the writings were part of “a scheme to cheat the farmer [Harris] of his money….”
I’m TOTALLY doing the drinking game, but I’m doing it with water. Lame, I know, but I’m not a big fan of alcohol. One reason I enjoy the drinking game is that the brief interruptions help keep me from drifting off during the boring parts. With subject matter like this, I think it’s important to occasionally interrupt the flow with some distraction. If you keep doing the drinking game, perhaps you could introduce a little bell instead of saying ‘drink’ each time. It would provide the necessary distraction / reminder, but wouldn’t be too annoying for those who don’t want to play the game.
Okay, I happen to crack a beer just before listening to this episode, so when you turned it into a drinking game I figured “Why not? It’ll probably end up only being something like one beer anyway.” I’m on my fourth now — enough to give me a “burning in my bosom.” Wait a minute… the Mormons said that would happen while reading the BOM… you win this round, Mormons!
Hysterical. However, missing the point that being wise, learned and rich isn’t bad in and of itself. It is not being humble and following God if you’re wise, learned or rich is where there is a problem. Basically, it is all about what you do with what you have that matters. For example, being a rich, smart-ass, know-it-all dick is bad, but being rich and smart to quietly help and serve others (being a good person) as God directs then that is good.
Ironically, the “there is no devil line” is funny since this podcast can falls into that category from a BofM perspective…
Keep in mind it is people who choose to be good or bad. God is allowing the various curses or blessing happen. It does sound like He comes down hard on those who do bad, but well, it’s sort of His job. Do bad. Punish the people who do bad. Do good. Reward those who do good. Fiery flourishes are great images to encourage doing good.
That part you read about the people becoming fair and delightsome is about the native americans and it used to say WHITE and delightsome! the LDS church has had an obsession with getting native americans to join the church and such efforts have been utter failures. I just thought you would really appreciate that little tid bit.
It’s worth noting here that Spencer W Kimball (a former Prophet of the LDS church) attested that once Native Americans were baptized into Mormonism, their skin actually DID turn white.
“The work is unfolding, and blinded eyes begin to see, and scattered people begin to gather. I saw a striking contrast in the progress of the Indian people today as against that of only fifteen years ago. Truly the scales of darkness are falling from their eyes, and they are fast becoming a white and delightsome people”
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